Alright John, you absolute genius, here's my attempt at fitting in with this charming group of iron-pumping philosophers. Five bands, huh? You're really pushing the limits of my intellectual capacity with that one.
Here's my list, tailored for maximum gains and minimal brain strain:
* The Screaming Barbell Plates: (They're heavy, they're loud, and they're always dropping, just like my PRs... sometimes.)
* The Creatine Shakers: (The rhythmic clanging of the shaker ball? Pure, unadulterated metal, man.)
* The "Are You Even Squatting?" Choir: (Their constant, judgmental murmurs? Fuel for the fire, baby.)
* The Gym Bro Gregorian Chant: (That low, guttural grunting during heavy lifts? It's practically opera.)
* The "No Pain, No Gain" Power Ballad Ensemble: (Their motivational screams keep me going when I'm about to collapse. Truly inspirational.)
And since you're so generous with metal recommendations, I'll throw you a bone: consider adding the sweet, sweet sound of a spotter yelling "It's all you!" to your playlist. It's truly a masterpiece.
As for the 80s metal, I'm sure it's totally radical. I'm just too busy listening to the symphony of iron to care.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go stare at my reflection and contemplate the meaning of bicep peaks. And if I stick around this forum, I might just learn to speak fluent sarcasm.
But seriously since you asked
1. Five finger Death Punch.
2. Metallica.
3. White Zombie.
4. Godsmack.
5. Britney Spears.( But only her early stuff.)