Talking about stress and issues

[John]

You got a double dose a stress s, I bet you were hittin the hell outta that pen last night…

 

[Bigmurph6]

Please don’t brother remember that taking anything like that won’t fix the problem it will just make it worse because you will most likely just go on another run and once you start getting dopesick you will be stuck in the cycle again
Just relax hit the gym or go do some cardio.

 

[Youts]

I won’t, was a rough night man, sorry for the post, guess I had no where else to vent.

Been a stressful few days, trying to figure shit out.

 

[Bigmurph6]

Don’t be sorry for anything im glad that you posted and you can always vent if you’re in a situation like that many of us have been there and are here to help brother we don’t want anyone to get caught up again were here for you brother im glad that you got through the night ive been clean for almost a decade and I still have alot of I would love to use again moments it happens to all of us and there dangerous because of overdose and because you can get caught up in the cycle so fast.
Vent anytime you need to Im sorry that I wasn’t on to help and I appreciate that @Raphael3636 was on there will always be someone on who can talk to you

 

[Outlawthing]

We all have Bad days boss hell my wife stays so far up my ass her nose would break if I turned a corner fast people are stupid at work drive stupid are STUPID too when I have a bad day I usually remind myself that I got a lot of good left in me and came to damn far climbing outta that hole to dig another one figure I’m closer to the end than the beginning now point any frustration towards something positive the gym go shoot something (not someone) your wife’s butthole your butthole if you need to vent here by all means keyboard whip the shit outta my ass long as we can still have a beer afterwards that’s what friends are for even if what brought us together. Kinda keeps us apart we still a community

 

[Youts]

Thanks guys, thanks for the support.
Was just so frustrated, had no idea what I did, got stranded in town 30 miles from home, and damn wanted it all to go away for awhile.
She gets pissed over something, won’t talk to me for a few days then comes back, the roller coaster gets tough. I know I did shitty things while using, I’ve apologized so many times for them, but everytime she gets pissed about something it gets thrown at me, hardest part is she had her own struggles with it.
Sometimes you just want to change your name and move to a different city lol.
And we only have one vehicle right now since mine got totalled hitting a deer, damn maybe the owner of the gym will just let me live there!

 

[Dirtnasty]

Don’t feel bad I almost put an order for an oz of blow in during the shutdown. Glad I didn’t get may have lost even more of this hard earned size I have

 

[Bigmurph6]

Its a difficult situation because both of you used. If she needs space give her space for a couple of days because just like you feel shitty so does she it sounds like you guys are recently clean I believe that you have said 14 months before and its hard for along time after you get clean.
I wish you the best brother there’s really no answer its just time and what I do is push my anxiety into the weights and the gym. Try to find a hobby it took me 6yrs to figure out a hobby. I collect something that gives me peace and makes me happy and I can sit down with my collection and get into a peaceful place its amazing I never thought that I could find a hobby.
Whatever it might be for you it will definitely help if you can find one to fill up the extra time. Once you get clean you realize how much time there actually is in a day lol

 

[Youts]

Looking back it’s amazing how much time I wasted looking for pills!

 

[Outlawthing]

Have the same deal boss my wife has never jumped the fence on anything so my struggles put a big red target on my back for stupid daily marriage Stuff. It was her go to trump card it took a lot on both sides to get over it on both sides not easy I know 10yrs and still have to work on it some days

 

[Bigmurph6]

Me also except I got all mine from doctors. It was crazy being able to tell doctors what I wanted and they gave me whatever I asked for it was insane one of my doctors got over 200yrs.
Im sure he appealed but that was his original sentence he had 7 offices and not me but multiple people would go to all 7 without any issues. I would never do that
They ruined a huge part of my life and I know that I had a part in me being a junkie but my first doctor I saw for pain gave me 180 80mg oxycontin right from the beginning.
That’s outrageous and I didn’t know it then but it really messed me up I didn’t know that medication could get you addicted like that until one morning I started throwing up.

 

[Youts]

Holy shit! 180 80mg oxycontin??? Right off the bat? Damn, that’s fucked up, I remember the first time I took 80mg it fucked me up.

 

[Youts]

Glad you didn’t get it too, man.

 

[Dirtnasty]

Me too I already have enough sinus issues

 

[Youts]

I used to love to read, but damn ever since detox it’s been so hard to concentrate on things like that, I’m sure the drugs fucked up the wiring in my brain, but my concentration just isn’t what it was pre-addiction.

 

[Youts]

Lol me too, I was a snorter of oxycodone, so now it’s like I have a perpetual plugged up sinuses.

 

[Dirtnasty]

I snorted everything I took even regular aspirin and such when I took it hahhaa.

 

[Youts]

That’s been one of the hardest things for me, that feeling of snorting, it’s weird how you crave the feeling.

I’d be lying if I said I never did that, snorted paxil once, that was horrid.

 

[Youts]

Thanks for the talk guys, you have no idea how much it helps.

 

[Dirtnasty]

Loved the drip it’s kind of like dipping the weird part I enjoyed was watching the spit go down the bottle