Dirts 2g of test test log

[Dirtnasty]

Didn’t get to gym this morning had a stomach bug Sunday so didn’t have the energy for squats may just do them Friday so it’s not basically two weeks off hitting them till meet

 

[Dirtnasty]

To say I was dehydrated todiqy is under statement I just drink 50 oz of fluids with my meal. Also one of my coworker commented on me eating super fast

 

[JLee]

The stomach bug is floating around. Two of my kids have it. Hopefully it doesn’t last long so you can get ready for the meet!

 

[Dirtnasty]

I mean I put away some food last night so I think I’m good

 

[NeuroRN]

he was getting a swirly

My man bringing back the swirly

 

[Dirtnasty]

Bad news will maybe elaborate more tomorrow

 

[Ripgut]

The suspense is killing me…

 

[Dirtnasty]

Relaspe

 

[Rusty]

What kind of relapse brother? I know you been partying somewhat. I have the best for you. Most guys I know relapse it’s over cause they cannot handle the old dose they use too. But we talking H here. However dealers cutting fen in everything now it’s scary s shit

 

[Ripgut]

Keep your head up my man…

 

[Poppy]

You ok?

 

[Rusty]

Hope he ok. Brother been doing so good. Don’t worry bout the relapse @Dirtnasty Why is your windshield so much bigger then your rear view mirror? Because what is infront of you is so much more important then what’s behind you.

Got love for you brother!!

 

[Poppy]

I hope so too.

@Dirtnasty

Hit us back when you feel like it.

 

[Dirtnasty]

So I did 14 g of coke saturday thru Tuesday. I say relapse but truth is I never stopped using just had down to once or twice a month. So we are looking at treatment options for me going forward. This Means I’m most likely not doig my meet on Saturday

 

[JLee]

That sucks to hear about the relapse as well as not being able to compete but it’s good to know your looking into treatment. Stay strong bud

 

[Dirtnasty]

Like I said it’s not really a relapse. I hate to admit it hasn’t been use for fun it’s more of f punishment to my self than anything I don’t enjoy the looking my self in my room and being paranoid hours on end. I have a lot wrong in my brain and I have to work through it other wise it will be my end soon. I need to find the reason I won’t allow my self to be happy or have nice things. The only person holding me back is my self I’ve known this for over two decades but never try and fix it. I’m ready to I know it won’t be easy but I have to this know or liek I said I’ll just end up another statistic.

 

[Rusty]

Well you know we all here at UGM havent seen each other face to face but we know one another better than most know us and for that you know there is a lot of love here for you brother. Your honesty is very courageous and I respect you for that. This is the best thing you can do for starters is admit this and you did it. I am very proud of you!! I would love for you to become a part of our support group. We meet on zoom. We hold each other accountable. We support each other. Hell the other day I wanted to drink really bad after dropping off my daughters so I called a brother from here and we talked for a while until it subsided. I called a brother who has over 20 years clean and he has an open phone policy that anyone can call him anytime. I want to invite you to our group brother!!! As far as the competition goes well I would stay clean as you can and go for it. You worked hard to get to this point and who cares about winning or losing. Just go to learn and have the experience. You may not be at your peak but fuck it!! Enjoy it and have fun just competing screw the results just have fun!!

 

[Dirtnasty]

My issue there is going by myself to aNother city on my own is probably not in my best interest for my mental state I may go and not come back

 

[Poppy]

You still got your job?

 

[Dirtnasty]

Yes