Military always busting on military lol

[TG1]

If it wasn’t for the 75th, Marines wouldn’t have role models when they grow up.

An army ranger looks to a marine and asks if he wants to here a joke about how dumb Marines are
The marine replies “the guy sitting next to me is a marine and so is the guy sitting next him, are you sure you want to tell that joke”

The ranger thinks then says “nah I don’t want to explain it three times”

 

[Bigmurph6]

Lol

That got me laughing

 

[TG1]

“A vegan, cross-fitter and a marine walk into a bar…”
“I know because they announced it as soon as they walked in”

I can go all day with these lol

 

[TG1]

What do you call a marine with an IQ of 160?
A Battalion.

 

[TBU]

I always love the Army. EVERYTIME I get in a conversation with them it starts out like this “I was going to join the Marines…” that’s when I interrupt them and say but you didn’t.

 

[TG1]

Why does the Navy carry around Marines?

Sheep would be too obvious.

 

[Bigmurph6]

You would need some good swimming sheep lol

 

[TG1]

Marines have always loved competitions.

Loading…

www.queerty.com

 

[TG1]

Lol I just realized we completely derailed this thread. @John @TBU

 

[TBU]

. Here’s my favorite Marine joke.

An Army Ranger was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana and he wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. After becoming very frustrated with the “no haggle” attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the Ranger shouted, “maybe I’ll just go out and get my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes made at a reasonable price!” The vendor said, “By all means, be my guest. Maybe you will run into a couple of Marines who were in here earlier saying the same thing.” So the Ranger headed into the bayou that same day and a few hours later came upon two men standing waist deep in the water. He thought, “those must be the two Marines the guy in town was talking about.” Just then, the Ranger saw a tremendously long gator swimming rapidly underwater towards one of the Marines. Just as the gator was about to attack, the Marine grabbed its neck with both hands and strangled it to death with very little effort. Then both Marines dragged it on shore and flipped it on its back. Laying nearby were several more of the creatures. One of the Marines then exclaimed, "Damn, this one doesn’t have any shoes either…

 

[TBU]

You looking for a date @TG?

 

[TBU]

What happens when you get a bunch of military folks together. Start taking over the place.

 

[Bigmurph6]

I will take care of that

 

[TG1]

The title you gave this sounds like a bad porno… @John may get a bit too excited.

 

[Bigmurph6]

Its open to interpretation lol

 

[John]

Just sat down to enjoy and appreciate a good lunch, and this is the clusterfuck of jokes and a marine representing mr.cocksucker of the fucking world?? I didn’t even know that was a thing, and why the fuck would the dude do it, that pole-smoker represents my MARINE Branch of the service like that.This is why my head is in the sand when it comes to paying attention to most of the outside world, it’s garbage.

 

[McSwickles]

mr.cocksucker of the fucking world

That’s easily the funniest thing I will here all day!!!

 

[TBU]

I have two questions.
Why do you have this website?
And did you get a chub from it?

 

[TG1]

1. So people don’t get fucked over by fake shit like happened to me. Thanks Phil Hernon.
2. I always have a chub when I see you or @John posting.

 

[Bigmurph6]

It took me a second but that’s a good one