Diary of a middle aged, fat, broken mans comeback

@Dirtnasty. I think I need to look into adding HGH to my protocol. I’m 40, about to be 41, and I’ve been very hard on my body, the fake hip is evidence of that.
 
Little update… since my shoulder isn’t thrilled with me right now, I’ve changed my workout to an upper/lower split with 2 upper workouts and 2 lower workouts a week. I’ll be going easy on any pressing exercises that bother my shoulder, however most of my shoulder issue is being caused by a bit of biceps tendinitis. My long head origin is pretty swollen and keeps rolling in and out of the supraglenoid tubercle causing most of my shoulder issues, so for the foreseeable future, biceps exercises will be a no no as well, as I already suffered a partial tear of my right biceps tendon insertion many many years ago. I will still be deadlifting though, that does not seem to bother my biceps or shoulder, and I’ll be pushing myself on box squats now… when one part is weak, we bring up the other parts.
I’ll be adding chains and bands back into my workouts, and pushing the volume up of the exercises up, there’s a deadlift only meet my old gym and team puts on every year I may try to do… 600+ @ 198 with a fake hip is reasonable
 
I’m hoping today my shoulder cooperates and I can get back to my allot that was working real well
 
Looks like you and I will be doing the legs thing man. I really hope This thing is torn but I felt some shit not right on the bench today
 
Rest it, let it heal, and remember to EASE back into things. I fought a pec/biceps tendon strain for almost a year once because I had it in my head that I could jump right back into real training as soon as it felt better. Also, get on EFS and invest in some blue heat, and the pink stuff too… they work amazing!
 
Going to pull 400 tonight if it kills me! Got my head half ass right tonight… deadlifts seem to be the only thing in my life going well right now

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Outfuckingstanding buddy. Glad the deadlifts are helping your BHG, (brain housing group) to feel a bit better, I have a appointment with a new therapist tomorrow, not a meds one which I started recently, but the one you just talk to, I’m dreading it, drinking a bit heavy tonight to help sleep better, can’t stop thinkin about all the shit I gotta discuss tomorrow, but if your a bit happier, then I should be to.
 
@John it felt good to finally feel like I was actually moving something again… I talk to some people at work here and there, guys I’m close with, tell them about some of the shit going on in my life and in my head… I’ve thought about seeing a doctor to talk to, someday I may try it! I hope it helps you man, you deserve to be a bit happier!
 
I find just telling random strangers the fucked uo shut in my head makes me feel better. They probably feel
Worse though. Cheaper than doc so there’s that
 
Half the time is gay men trying to hit on me so you want this booty meat you gots to hear all my issues first
 
I saw a therapist a few years back @John and @JB_rD81 when my life was spiraling into the shit. It was very uncomfortable telling some stranger my thoughts. He taught me how to re process information and it helped alot with my anger and anxiety. My only advice is to be honest with them.
 
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