Dirts tren harder than last time log

[Thunder]

Brother how much tren are you doing a week?

 

[Dirtnasty]

Just finished week 9 of 700

 

[Dirtnasty]

They are letting me leave work today I’m going to try and get sleep and hope that helps if not a trip to the mental ward maybe next step

 

[Thunder]

Drop the tren brotha, immediately man!
Grab you some strong indica and get your chill on.
It’s the tren bro, there’s nothing wrong with you. Your good.

 

[Dirtnasty]

Can’t smoke we get drug tests also I have clinical depression with suicidal thoughts before the aas use so this isn’t thee to me

 

[Rusty]

Is the Tren making your moods worse?

 

[Dirtnasty]

Had no issues till yesterday I feel sick overall though I’ve been in and out of sleep since 8. My body keeps feeling worse though mj y rear delts feel
Like they went through work out and I haven’t been to gym since Wednesday

 

[Dirtnasty]

Well
T temp has risen 1 degree since 6 just had coworker leave work with covid yesterday. Not going to lie would feel better if that’s what’s causing bad mind space but not good this close to comp. Good new not covid but I think it’s just my autoimmune shit flaring up getting sores on ass and whole body is just hurting so bad

 

[Dirtnasty]

@Poppy @herrubermensch thinks for the words in other thread you would think by now I realize when
My mental date goes south and then body starts to hurt I would know what’s happening but unfortunately I tend to forget I have an autoimmune disease. Luckily it’s happy g this week and not week of meet. I’ve slept some and. Feel better mentally I do deserve good shit. Abs will win this meet the baord needs some good at juat do fil week of gym as my joints and muscles are crazy sore. Its very possible that it’s psoriatic arthritis but they said that doesn’t work explain some of my symptoms that pop up. May I shouldn’t put all my shit out here I’m not looking for pity I just have that issue I can’t hold anything in. I’m lucky to have. Great boss that when I asked if I could leave yesterday didn’t eve hesitate to say do what I need

 

[Dirtnasty]

So I’m trying to schedule my bloodwork. Purchased the anti-aging panel to get all the important markers a few weeks ago they emailed me that my tile wasn’t good anymore and I can’t enter any date May have use a different location making ahit difficult

 

[Rusty]

You’ll make it through big guy.

 

[Dirtnasty]

Getting back to gym today bench then squats tomorrow and my last dead lifts day on Sunday I think

 

[Dirtnasty]

130/77 today

 

[Poppy]

Looking good

 

[Dirtnasty]

Feeling better out 10 pounds back in yesterday

 

[Poppy]

Good to hear you’re feeling better

 

[John]

Good words @Dirtnasty

 

[Dirtnasty]

Well fever returned today face is swollen up as well gojg to see dr in morning

 

[Dirtnasty]

This depressive
State just won’t leave me. I have to do gym tomorrow it’s the only thing that I feel could save me at this point. I also have to stop seeing ex because I feel the short feeling of anything good during sex then gets worse I know it’s not fair to her she wants relationship i don’t. Shorty part about the sleep is it’s nothing but nightmares the whole time my brain is feeling clearer but it’s still having same thoughts they just seem more
Thought out now

 

[Dirtnasty]

Well couldn’t fall back asleep so I just did tne and Abomb’s goign to gym at 12. It will either be great workout if horrible but I will do it none then less