Get where I want or die trying Banned comeback

[Bigmurph6]

LOG

SLEEP 3HRS awake all night again I don’t understand I take enough medication to knock down an elephant im Banned but im no elephant lol

Training I got a great leg routine in so much that my hips hurt and im sore. Still can’t sleep
Cardio struggling for 2hrs in the yard

Eat nothing im going to try to eat something now

DHEA 100mg split

Things have been bad the past couple of days im not sure why but I keep pushing forward

 

[JB_rD81]

Kill it! When orhers would’ve laid down and quit, you’ve pushed on!

 

[Bigmurph6]

Im starting to be able to train but no nutrition is killing me I put in alot of hard labor 2hrs worth that was huge way more than usual plus a leg routine and I am starving but can’t eat and honestly I’ve been using marijuana to eat but im not a drug addict anymore I don’t like being stoned all the time just to eat.
Im stuck I haven’t been doing well and I might have pushed too far possibly a rest day today.

 

[Bigmurph6]

LOG

SLEEP 3hrs maybe

TRAINING need a rest day I believe I pushed to much yesterday or a combination of days with no nutrition no sleep. I might grow a pair and get it done.

EAT none

DHEA 100MG SPLIT not seeing much did get hard yesterday again though

 

[JB_rD81]

@Bigmurph, can you try liquid nutrition at all? Probably not the most appetizing or fulfilling, but may be an Avenue that helps

 

[Bigmurph6]

Its crazy last night I was planning on buying boost chocolate or ensure something depending on cost but its probably the route im going to take

 

[Poppy]

@JB_rD81

Might be on to something. Not ideal but liquid meals is better than nothing. Find something you can tolerate.

 

[Bigmurph6]

Your correct I was reading about it and it was hard because I relate boost to my buddy who passed he always had it and always gave me one I like the boost and it does keep nutrition in you

My other buddy drank it for 6 months when he got his jaw broke in 3 places they wired him up no real food at all.

The only reason I haven’t is because of the relation between boost and my buddy I don’t want it to be that and go out like that

 

[Poppy]

Give it a shot

 

[Bigmurph6]

Im probably going to pick up some today or next pharmacy visit

 

[Poppy]

Do you think your stomach could tolerate an emergenC?

 

[Bigmurph6]

I have learned that its not the food or anything that’s bad or worse its all the same no matter what it is it does the same thing if you heard my insides right now you would cringe

 

[Poppy]

You know prior to my first wife walking out it was a living hell for a couple of years. I had a small business and the stress at the house caused major stomach issues. To the point I would have to pull over on the road doubled over and wait for it to subside. Doc had me on the purple pill nexium i think (it was still new). I was in bad shape. After my wife left and a couple of months later when things settled down a bit… my issues cleared right up. I haven’t been on any stomach meds for almost 20 years.

I tell people i lost 200 pounds of ugly fat to get better. Hahaha

 

[Bigmurph6]

That last line killed me laughing

It had to be ugly fat lol your hilarious brother

Me and the wife are good I don’t even really stress to much here with all you guys helping

 

[Bigmurph6]

LOG

SLEEP 4hrs

EAT a chicken breast

TRAINING yesterday none rest day today might be another I really pushed myself to hard 2 days ago and still feeling really beat up im going to try and do some arms today though

DHEA 100mg split been good getting hard again and liking this compound.

Things aren’t going well but there not bad either so im looking forward to having a good day

 

[JB_rD81]

Keep killing it man! A rough leg workout can sideline me for multiple days! I did squats last night and had to stop as my right quad felt like it was going to tear off my knee… my wife told me it might be time to give up on squats, there’s other things that will carry over to deadlift strength. I blew up on her and it carried over to today, I can feel a low in the Roller Coaster ride I’m constantly on coming on quick…

 

[Bigmurph6]

That sucks brother we gotta get you to the doctor

Yeah I did a leg workout and did some things outside and it kicked my ass I need to tone it back and just move forward a little slower

 

[JB_rD81]

I’m actively seeking a psychiatrist, my work schedule is so damn hectic it’s hard, but the next few weeks I’ll be working 10 hr days 2hrs from home, so I’ll have fridays off and can maybe go then. I can’t keep everything bottled any more, and I can’t keep having my wife poke poke poke until I’m on the verge of exploding

 

[Bigmurph6]

I go through the same thing my wife is a big trigger for me because she knows what buttons to push and she does do it on purpose sometimes smh

You don’t have to worry about your schedule brother everything is on your phone its all telemedicine because the psychiatrists are lazy so it works well for you just gotta make an appointment because there 3 months away in my area

 

[Bigmurph6]

LOG

SLEEP 4hrs

EAT 2 chicken breast

TRAINING arms done and I got cardio in walking outside its so hot my shirt was like I jumped in a pool with clothes on smh

DHEA 100mg split been good getting hard again and liking this compound.

Things aren’t going well but there not bad either so im looking forward to having a good day.

Im having a good day so far just my stomach still bothering me