I really appreciate it but thats not what’s happening all I hear are doors closing and locking.
I know im being negative as fuck but I’ve been waiting since January to get help I haven’t slept or eaten in longer than I can remember normally.
All that is to much I can’t keep getting beaten and not be able to swing back
Im just an idiot sometimes because of my anger and the issues I have medically happening my log might have been over on that day but since I have been moving around like an armed nuclear weapon and guess what I got the people to get there asses in gear and get me help.
Its really sad that I have to act like a 6 yr old throwing a temper tantrum for people to see that im not fucking around and im not leaving until you help.
People got really used to being able to tell people over the phone to fuck off. I decided to get back in person and start handling shit. What do you know in person they acted dumbfounded that I wouldn’t just leave and that they actually had to do their job.
Im back on track now to get help and get better just had to throw 2 chairs and punch some windows (didn’t break any just for shock effects)
and it worked so I feel no shame I believe that they should for making me have to act like that its the reason I want help in the first place.
LOG BACK ON
EAT nothing yet
Training arms today done
Sleep 5hrs
Cardio 30min stationary bike
Weight 221lb
Im getting back on this train without a seat or not and nothing or no one is going to stop me moving forward anyone who gets in my way will be told that the train is coming get off the fucking tracks because this train isn’t stopping for anyone anymore.
Banned not bitchmurph fuck the world im coming back from this bullshit.
Im just an idiot sometimes because of my anger and the issues I have medically happening my log might have been over on that day but since I have been moving around like an armed nuclear weapon and guess what I got the people to get there asses in gear and get me help.
Its really sad that I have to act like a 6 yr old throwing a temper tantrum for people to see that im not fucking around and im not leaving until you help.
People got really used to being able to tell people over the phone to fuck off. I decided to get back in person and start handling shit. What do you know in person they acted dumbfounded that I wouldn’t just leave and that they actually had to do their job.
Im back on track now to get help and get better just had to throw 2 chairs and punch some windows (didn’t break any just for shock effects)
and it worked so I feel no shame I believe that they should for making me have to act like that its the reason I want help in the first place.
LOG BACK ON
EAT nothing yet
Training arms today done
Sleep 5hrs
Cardio 30min stationary bike
Weight 221lb
Im getting back on this train without a seat or not and nothing or no one is going to stop me moving forward anyone who gets in my way will be told that the train is coming get off the fucking tracks because this train isn’t stopping for anyone anymore.
Banned not bitchmurph fuck the world im coming back from this bullshit.
I’m so confused about what is happening, @Bigmurph ! Why in the world would your doctor refuse to treat you for your stomach condition? I want to help. I have a gastroenterologist in NYC who is great and will see you, and don’t worry about the cost. You just need to get yourself to his office. We GOTTA get you able to EAT or you’re going nowhere. LMK if you want to pursue, but this is “refusal to treat” someone in your condition is complete bullshit.
We’ve talked about it before. Treating people with mental health is real life horror story. Either they don’t give a shit or they just keep blindly throwing meds at you. It sucks to have use the nuclear option but sometimes you have to let people know your not fucking around!
That is a tough one. True schizoaffective disorder has to have separate psychosis episodes but is mostly mood disorder like depression but having delusional thinking or the bi polar type with loss of impulse control or anger or hallucinations. It’s not straight-up scizophrenia but an antidepressant and antipsychotic might be prescribed. Or anti mania drugs even benzos to calm. I’ve seen a lot of depression but with anger and extreme hopelessness called schizoaffective. Sleep deprivation is a crisis if it goes on and the fuck it attitude comes on. I like when a provider gives a few xanax and the starts whatever they think. Don’t give up. Hormones or lack of play a part in those of us that have used them. I never recommend nothing. Even clomid alone can be good. You are not alone! Mental illness is so common and hidden by so many because we are supposed pull ourself up by our bootstraps and never ask for help. Fuck that.
Well thanks for making everything I told you privately public but I don’t really care anyone says anything bad about my mental state and I will freak out.
Its true I have sczoeffective disorder it effects you with scizophrenia and bi polar disorder but is different than bi polar 1
Its the mental lottery extremely hard to diagnose and extremely hard to treat. You win the lottery they say because you get the worst of both smh
I suffer from all symptoms except I have never heard anything that wasn’t there all the rest is true im highly functional is what they say and they say that high intelligence is usually part of the disorder also just information on weird things that normal people know nothing about AAS, BTC CRYPTO HISTORY I can go on and on ive been diagnosed by 4 psychiatrists almost immediately which I don’t know how they never explain how they can tell but after about 5 minutes they all told me that was my diagnosis the original was at a very young age they didn’t even have a name for the condition yet they called it scizophrenia and mania which is now psczoeffective disorder.
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